Best Two Weeks of the Year

Admittedly a baseball homer, but how can these last two weeks not excite the casual fan. In the American League there are 6 teams vying for 2 playoff spots. The Orioles, The Yankees, The Royals, The Indians, and The Rangers are all within 3.5 games of each other. Most teams have 12 games or less left to play. After 5 1/2 months of grinding baseball it comes down to playing the best two weeks of baseball. This makes people people in Kansas City and Cleveland have something to care about. Even with this new format, people in these cities are not coming to the games. There was 10,786 announced gate at a Rangers/Rays game on Tuesday. There was 60,870 at the Tampa Bay Buccaneers New Orleans Saints football game this past Sunday. I know football is king in this country, but come on Tampa Bay! You have a team that could win the World Series. The Buccaneers lost to the East Rutherford Jets in Week 1.

I had the privilege of attending the Atlanta Braves Washington Nationals day game yesterday. The Nationals have been playing fantastic baseball and have a real outside chance to make the playoffs in the National League if the Cincinnati Reds collapse. The announced gate was 25,066.. they were lucky if they had 8,000 people. To be fair, people were probably still spooked from the Navy Yard shooting the day prior. There was 82,743 at the Washington Redskins home opener. I sat 5 rows back and I think Bryce Harper was trying to use me as the cut off man in the 9th. It was a fantastic game with the Braves coming back from 3-0 to score 5 runs in the last three innings to take a 5-3 lead into the bottom of the 9th.
The Braves sent out their lights out closer Craig Kimbrel to finish the game. Kimbrel had not blown a save since early May. The Nationals willed there way to a win with walks and ground balls  to a 6-5 win. I am pulling for the Nationals, but I do not think this city is equipped for playoff baseball. Any city where the majority of people are wearing jackets to a game that I get a sunburn at do not deserve Autumn baseball.

American League
AMERICAN	W	L	PCT	GB	HOME	ROAD	RS	RA	DIFF	STRK	L10
Texas	82	68	.547	-	39-35	43-33	667	599	+68	Won 1	2-8
Tampa Bay	82	68	.547	-	46-29	36-39	640	601	+39	Lost 1	5-5
Cleveland	82	69	.543	.5	45-30	37-39	686	631	+55	Won 1	6-4
Baltimore	80	70	.533	2	42-33	38-37	699	652	+47	Won 2	5-5
NY Yankees	79	72	.523	3.5	44-31	35-41	619	636	-17	Lost 4	4-6
Kansas City	79	72	.523	3.5	41-36	38-36	610	570	+40	Lost 1	6-4
LA Angels	73	78	.483	9.5	35-40	38-38	692	688	+4	Lost 1	6-4
Toronto	69	81	.460	13	37-39	32-42	663	708	-45	Won 1	5-5
Seattle	66	85	.437	16.5	33-42	33-43	578	710	-132	Lost 3	2-8
Minnesota	64	86	.427	18	31-43	33-43	577	710	-133	Lost 2	3-7
Chicago Sox	60	91	.397	22.5	35-40	25-51	559	665	-106	Won 2	4-6
Houston	51	100	.338	31.5	24-53	27-47	591	793	-202	Lost 4	4-6
National League
NATIONAL	W	L	PCT	GB	HOME	ROAD	RS	RA	DIFF	STRK	L10
Pittsburgh	87	64	.576	-	48-28	39-36	582	541	+41	Lost 2	6-4
Cincinnati	86	66	.566	-	48-26	38-40	662	549	+113	Won 2	6-4
Washington	81	70	.536	4.5	44-32	37-38	620	594	+26	Won 3	9-1
Arizona	76	74	.507	9	43-33	33-41	632	632	0	Lost 1	5-5
Philadelphia	71	80	.470	14.5	43-34	28-46	581	698	-117	Won 2	7-3
San Diego	70	80	.467	15	41-33	29-47	574	659	-85	Won 3	7-3
San Francisco	70	81	.464	15.5	38-38	32-43	593	647	-54	Won 4	7-3
Colorado	69	83	.454	17	42-32	27-51	660	696	-36	Lost 1	3-7
NY Mets	67	83	.447	18	31-44	36-39	582	648	-66	Lost 1	4-6
Milwaukee	67	83	.447	18	35-41	32-42	593	652	-59	Won 3	7-3
Chicago Cubs	63	88	.417	22.5	29-46	34-42	578	637	-59	Lost 4	3-7
Miami	55	96	.364	30.5	31-44	24-52	485	618	-133	Lost 4	2-8

Glossary

CONCACAF and the World Cup

Grant Wahl over at SI.com came out with an article a little over a week ago where he made the following statement:

"The dirty little secret of CONCACAF is that the region doesn't deserve its current 3.5 World Cup slots and probably should get no more than two. World Cup qualifying in CONCACAF is one of the most forgiving formats in world soccer, allowing you to mess up again and again and again (as Mexico has during this Hex) and still have a chance of advancing to the Big Show in Brazil."

 I don't know much about other confederations' qualification processes, but that is surely nothing to hold against CONCACAF.  CONCACAF directly benefits from sending its best teams to the World Cup so why would it have an unforgiving process that could send the BVIs?  That was a dumb comment, Grant.  Regardless, and as I'm sure you've guessed, I added the emphasis on what struck me as a particularly - nay, painfully - subjective statement.  And, quite naturally, Mr. Wahl provides nothing - not even overall win/loss records or something lame like that - in order to back up his assertion.

So I decided to help:

I know it's a little messy so let me explain.  The "FIFA coefficient" number is essentially the win-ratio average at the last 3 World Cups (since the far majority of players don't last more than 3 World Cups and it could be argued that the sport fundamentally changes sufficiently in 12 years to make anything before that more or less irrelevant).  Anyways, 1 point for a win and 0.5 for a draw in all matches against opponents outside your confederation in the World Cup (to maintain consistency throughout the rounds).  That total is divided by the total matches played for each of the 2002, 2006, and 2010 World Cups and the average is obtained.

[ (Total Points/Total Games) + (Total Points/Total Games) + (Total Points/Total Games) ] / 3

= FIFA Coefficient for the confederation for all 3 World Cups

Then, I simply divided the FIFA-allocated "WC Spots" by each Confederations' "AVG FIFA Rank" and multiplied it by the "FIFA Coefficient" number.  I think this should standardize everything and removed any of the bias that is entered due to some confederations having so many more countries than others.  I'm not really a statistics guy though.  Although I did enjoy Moneyball.

Anyways...The numbers seem to quite clearly indicate that CONCACAF, if anything, deserves one of Africa's spots.  UEFA and CONMEBOL are quite clearly a long ways ahead of everyone - and deservedly so - as South Korea in 2002 was the first team since the USofA waaay back at the beginning to make the semi's and NOT be Euro or Latino.  Those confederations are significantly better and as a result deserve commensurate representation.  If you take one of Africa's spots and give it to CONCACAF the coefficients look like this:

Much better distributed.  CONCACAF has performed better internationally (a higher FIFA Coefficient) even though it has a lower average FIFA ranking.  Asia and Africa have an identical FIFA Coefficient and if you take away one of Africa's spots and give it to CONCACAF, they now have a comparable "World Cup Slot Allocation Coefficient."  (I should really give the resultant column a title.)

Anyways...very messy...Again, I'm not a Stats guy.  I actually hated Stats...but I think these numbers show that Grant Wahl is nothing but a big, fat, lousy HATER.  U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

...JG

Side Thoughts:
1.  Is this why Luis Suarez received so much shit for the handball that prevented Ghana going through to the semis?  (because you all would have done the same thing.  Lying is a sin.)
2.  I feel like something needs to be done with the outliers.  The guys that really, really suck and will never have a chance to win.  But if you do that don't you have to remove the guys up top too?  In sports that doesn't seem to work.
3.  I had my doubts but UEFA really is the best confederation.  Thank you, Spain.
4.  Poor, Poor Oceania.

Used Golf Balls, Televisions & Life Advice

I was fortunate enough to be graced with a phone call this morning from my creator. Most of the conversations are not "conversations" but random life ramblings and everything my father has done in the last 48 hours. He started the conversation off by the anxiety he has from the excess amount of golf balls he has and how he needs to get ride of them. Mind you, the man does not purchase golf balls, but will wander aimlessly into the woods during a round of golf in search of more unneeded balls.(My comments blue, my father red. "Shamey, should I mail them to you?" "Used golf balls, Dad? No, I am good." "Well, what am I going to do with all these balls?" After a few more rambling thoughts, he quickly moved onto fitness. "Are you working out?" "Yeah, I "Yeah, your mother and I are doing great. I mean we are walking every day, I have lost 16 pounds, your mother 28 pounds, but you know.. It gets dark up here earlier, so I do not know where we are going to walk in the fall.. maybe drive to Leominster and let your mother walk around the mall at night." 

My dad quickly asked if I had unlimited minutes (he was calling from the landline) "Yes" "You know Shamey, Mom and I will send down the old T.V. to you. I mean we do not need it. We will ship it down." "No, thanks Dad I do not want "Why? why do you not want the T.V.? It is a nice TV. you know you can watch your soccer matches on it?"  This is the TV he wants to ship to me.

After a good 5 minutes of firm No's and No, thank you's he understood accepted I did not want his pre-internet TV. From here we moved to one of his favorite topics Real Estate. "You know if I had bought a home in the Cape(Cod) 1980 versus this cesspool Gardner, the house would be 4 or 5 times the value. I mean I could not sell this house. This city has been decreasing in population since World War 1.. I mean who wants to live here. You got to get inside 495 if you want to live in Massachusetts." He jumped to how 1 in 3 old people fall down. "Where did you get that stat?' "Oh, it is all over the television. You know those infomercials.. so you think about those things when you get older.. your mother and I cannot be walking in the dark." Once he tired from talking he wrapped up the conversation with "Make sure you workout."

No Pasarán: Goodbye Jose

The Tomkins Times has published my latest bit of drivel.  It seems to have gone over well and the sad but God's honest truth is there's very little hyperbole involved.  That stuff happened.  Check it out:

http://tomkinstimes.com/2013/08/an-americans-trip-to-anfield/

And since I imagine you all aren't paying-members, here's the rest...

...I spend the rest of the evening on the Ropewalks trying to legitimise my [impossibly laughable] “American on a pilgrimage to Anfield,” bit before catching something that changes my plans: Anfield is open for Matchday stadium tours. It’s unexpected and provides an infinitely better exit excuse than headache avoidance, thus bringing to a close my evening out in Liverpool. It doesn’t, however, mellow the anticipation. Regardless, I eventually manage restless sleep and awake to find little has changed, the late morning greyness wholly mirroring that of the late afternoon. While I dress, I start to wonder if this place could be some Truman Show for REST (2) patients, some existential effort to catalogue the effect on a city, of a football club that scoffed at the creeping industrial decay in preference of an ascent to the peak of European influence: an-honest-to-Fowler, real-live per angusta ad augusta. Because the truth is that Liverpool’s is a shirt so laden with silverware that it on occasion proves suffocating, resembling much more albatross than Liver Bird to the players donning it.  And this didn’t occur by chance.  It was spurred by a support unified around a club it saw as an extension of the community in which they resided.  Through the gates of Anfield Road, the Scousers gathered and demonstrated through song and voice their devout admiration for a club experiencing the very opposite of their own:

“It turned you into a member of a new community, all brothers together for an hour and a half…you had escaped with most of your mates and your neighbours, with half the town, cheering together, thumping one another on the shoulders, swapping judgments like Lords of the Earth, having pushed your way through a turnstile into another and altogether more splendid life.”(3)

I hustle downtown in search of the #26 bus that will take me past Anfield.  It’s a full six hours before kickoff and I’m still hopeful that I’ll get on with a tour. And if not, a few pre-match pints at the Sandon should provide a more than sufficient alternative. Unfortunately the driver’s a Bluenose though and prolongs the trip through needless backtracking additional unnecessary stops (or so I imagine), before finally the Centenary Stand pierces the roofline. And it’s striking. But not striking in the sense of size or grandiose or anatomic beauty (4), it’s striking in its impossibly thorough regularity. It sits firmly within suburban stagnation, and it’s comfortable there.

I float off the bus, eyes fixed on “The Kop,” stand below Shankly’s outstretched arms and would swear the bricks whisper, “I’ve seen what a Franco-less Madrid, a Berlusconi-less Milan, and a Messi-less Barcelona can only dream of. I AM the proletariat. I AM THE BEAUTIFUL GAME.

And yet somehow …  some way … some people choose the Arsenal.

I can’t believe my luck as the final tour of the day departs shortly.  I join up to come within inches of the Istanbul cup, touch This is Anfield, and finally march down the players’ tunnel. Things seem to move very quickly around me. I sit in the first row and think – there’s Stevie Heighway’s left wing; Dalglish’s [or still Keegan’s?] #7; Bruce Grobbelaar’s wobbly legs; Shankly, Paisley, and Fagan pacing the sidelines… before noticing the group has walked on. It doesn’t matter though…a stream of YouTube clips is passing before my eyes. Here I am at Anfield … home to Liverpool Football Club for nearly 12 decades … the only home it’s ever had …. the most successful English side of all time …. the …

“Come along, Dev.  The tour’s ending” wipes away the moment. I walk on behind the Kop, and exit out into the frigid sogginess in search of that pre-match pint.

There’s something inexorably strange about being American and supporting Liverpool Football Club. And it’s much less ephemeral than “Built by Shanks, Destroyed by Yanks(5).” Despite its global appeal, the club is so profoundly Scouse and so firmly rooted to the heritage which spawned the Famous Red that pouring myself into it feels almost irresponsible.  How on earth, for example, can I ever truly come to terms with Hillsborough?  I waited with honest and genuine anticipation for the Panel’s words; I’ve watched and been moved by Bill Kenwright’s speech (on numerous occasions); I do not, no matter how tempting, under any circumstances, click on anything from the Sun; and even though I know very little about the woman, I can’t stand Margaret Thatcher. And yet every time I consider the thought of the 96 I feel guilty. Guilty that I’m attempting to force my way into a Club and a despair that could only have been lived to have been understood. Can you imagine losing a loved one? What about knowing the loss was through horrific event mismanagement ? And what about if afterwards he or she was blamed for it? For over two decades. And all along the way you’re told simply to “move on.” In what might turn out to be the understatement of my life: that’s difficult to grasp.

The subtleness with which Jose Reina has exited Liverpool, combined with his heartfelt goodbye letter, has finally got me to write about my trip to Anfield. And as I hope to have conveyed to you all, it was a genuinely special event for me. It didn’t matter that Liverpool were in the middle of its worst league finish in 50 years.  Or that I’d heard You’ll Never Walk Alone louder a few days earlier(6). Or that Liverpool’s latest sublime #7 didn’t play. Because after witnessing in person the angelic purity with which Kenny Dalglish celebrates each and every Liverpool goal, it dawned on me why I’m a Red. Rarely do clubs produce such devout acolytes in the manner and consistency in which Liverpool Football Club does. And rarely do clubs turn exceptional footballing talents into exceptional members of the community.

Pepe is right; it’s special. And it seems horribly unfair that when the tumble appears finally to have been halted and the putrid shadows of Hicks and Gillett to have finally been purged, Reina should be shown the door. But par excellence and as Dalglish before him, he remains almost impossibly gracious in exit. Jose Manual Reina Paez has served Liverpool loyally for eight years, through four managers, an 8th place finish, and in the face of resounding criticism for three full years now.  I for one will miss him greatly.  No pasaron, Pepe, ni pasarán.  You’ll Never Walk Alone.

(1) Winning a 5th European Cup was not just winning any other.  Until recently, any team that won three straight or five total got to keep the real, authentic trophy. Liverpool are one of five clubs that will forever possess a real European Cup. Eat your heart out Barcelona, Manchester, London, and France.

(2) REST = Restricted Environmental Stimulation Therapy

(3) J.B. Priestly – The Good Companions

(4) Yes, Anfield is alive.

(5) Of which, I am not.  I am a Southerner, thereby excluded from that wretched label.

(6) I got a ticket to the Old Firm as a warm-up for Anfield.

The Pittsburgh Pirates and US Men's National Soccer Team: One in the Same

The Pirates are enjoying a great run this year. They currently sit in 60-39 2nd in the National League
Central Division, but also the 2nd best record in all of baseball. They have some good young pitching and hitting and are relying on some old cast off arms to get them this far, but all Pirates fans are weary. They started really good last year before they collapsed. Their bullpen has been severely overachieving and their offense is pretty bleak after a few stars. From a franchise that has not had a winning season since the George H. Bush administration, Pirates fans should just be happy with the growing success and enjoy it while it last. US Soccer fans could learn a few lessons from Pirates fans.

The  U.S.Men's National Team is on an impressive run. They have won their last 10 matches (mostly against Central American Countries with smaller populations than Massachusetts), but nonetheless have been winning in convincing fashion. The team is easily playing their best brand of football in it's existence. They have played some free flowing offense that has been able to counter attack quickly and effectively. They have been able to maintain position and have been a real pleasure to watch. With most of these wins in the Gold Cup, where most countries are using their B+ squad, it should be taken with a grain of salt. The improvement is still is a testament to what Jurgen Klinsmann has done with the team. We wrap up the Gold Cup Finals against Panama in Chicago this weekend. A game we should win. All good things for the US in their growth towards consistently competing with the European and South American sides.

The team will play a friendly against Bosnia-Herzegovina(Size of West Virginia & Population of Louisiana) August 14th in Sarajevo. A good test to see how we stack up leading into the World Cup. A tie would be a good result, a win a great result. My allegiance to the US Men's National Team is similar to being a Pirates fan. I enjoy the good and try not to be overzealous in the brief success of the team. Will this team win the World Cup next summer? No Chance. In Russia in 2018? Nope. I am patient and understand it might be till the next Bush (see Jeb) takes office for the US to really taste success... what?! you are telling me Bush has no shot at POTUS?! oh well let me enjoy my Rock Shandy while it last.

Xenophobia used to be called PATRIOTISM.

It isn’t easy being an Ugly American.  In fact - and despite whatever Graham Greene philosophy you may be familiar with - it takes practice.  The namesake of Pass the Salt well remembers this [then young] correspondent honing his skills in the jungles of a certain Caribbean nation while hiking to a sequence of waterfalls.   Interestingly enough, the subject included an American girl who, after spending several months “giving back to the world” via rum-drenched evenings and vitamin D-inspired afternoons, decided to do one over on the system and assimilate!  It seems spending a year unwittingly proving the veracity of dependency theory simply wasn’t enough; she needed to go the distance and marry, VISA (can this be a verb?), and support a real-live example in the good ol’ USofA.  In short, it was the sort of Ugly American field-training that only Kenny Powers and hindsight can truly appreciate:  She was a fucking goldmine…and I the miner.

Anyway, having been called “the most offensive person I’ve ever met” is something I’ll treasure for the rest of my life.  Who knows…maybe when I’m holding little John Galt, III in my arms it’ll slip into the periphery, but probably not.  It was a very inspiring moment for me.  In fact, there’s a real chance it was THE catalyst for my burning desire to informationally [?] illuminate the world in the way only a true, experienced Ugly American can.  Some of my preferred topics include:

1.     The United States deserves #1 status through breakfast superiority alone.  And it isn’t remotely close.

2.     True American sporting enthusiasts understand the colossal importance of soccer’s off-side rule.

3.     American Southerners are Yankees as much as Zulus are Xhosa.  It’s offensive and gross to confuse this.

4.     The NFL, however bombastic it may be, uses the most well-rounded, competitive league structure on the planet.

You see, I’m a firm believer that in order to be able to really appreciate how wonderful America is, you need to have gotten around a little.  We actually have TOO many options in the States…which I’ll leave alone for now because it deserves its own blog post.  Regardless, it’s important for you to understand that I love traveling.  I love trying new food, discussing local politics, admiring how radically different the world’s cultures are, and…probably most of all…encountering Travel Purists.  What is a travel purist, you ask?  A travel purist generally falls into two oftentimes non-mutually exclusive categories: 

1.      The Ferris – The beginning stage of the travel purist often finds the Ferris satisfying his/her own ignorance by muttering baseless vagaries such as “See, if only American did it like you all” or “That’s another reason I hate the States” or “The US causes most of the problems in the world.”  Oftentimes the Ferris feels it necessary to tie America to events in which it has no direct relationship; in other words, a prerequisite of Stage 1 Travel purism is the remarkably thorough use of the Logical Fallacy*.  For example, just the other weekend I was in a hostel discussing the amplification of the Panama Canal with an interesting mix of extranjeros.  (“Expansion” is probably a better word, but the direct translation is “amplification”…which I suppose does sound a little sexier.)  Anyway…while discussing the obvious worldwide economic benefits, a young lady [from the West Coast] declared quite rigidly (paraphrasing here) that the economic benefits – no matter how large - did not adequately balance the destruction to the environment: America never cares about the environment.  The ecosystem, through the draining of sections of Gatun Lake, she concluded, was being decimated.  Evidently lost in her supreme benevolence is (a) Gatun Lake is manmade and (b) Europeans and Panamanians are building the new locks…not the Americans (We’ve been gone more than a decade, sweetheart).  After asking her if she knew Gatun Lake was man-made she replied…”Still. Sloths are endangered, you know.”  Sigh.

2.     The Jimi – The developed stages of Travel Purism sees the Ferris begin to develop a discernible level of haughtiness.  Visiting is now “experiencing” and traveling is now “witnessing.”  The absolutely essential prerequisite in graduating from Ferris to Jimi is the development of THE superior travel philosophy…that is, if you do not travel in the same manner in which the Jimi travels, you are not fully experiencing everything the country has to offer, nor witnessing the richness of the culture.  You're basically a phoney.  A wannabe.  A TYPICAL AMERICAN.  In this stage, a certain level of arrogance is demonstrated that interestingly jives damn near perfectly with the Paradox mentioned below.  After all, isn’t arrogance the consummate sin of the World Police?  Either way, one time in Siem Reap…after exploring probably the most remarkable architectural complex I have ever seen, a Jimi informed me that traveling to Cambodia was probably not worth it unless you had enough time to experience the culture…at least several months.  “I mean, that’s the only way to really experience anything.”  #shootme.

So what is an Ugly American then?  Am I one?  Or are those that seek to escape the stereotype so aggressively and actually return full circle to its basic premises the true Ugly Americans?  Every country has its oddities.  Rather than run from them, we should learn to embrace them.  It's much more fun.  Especially when you're from the best country of all.  U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!

…JG

*This in and of itself is fascinating to me.  One of the most widespread American stereotypes is that we, as Americans, believe everything came/comes from the States.  Thus, a Ferris reaching to tie America to events in which it has no direct relationship actually perpetuates one of the most fundamentally negative stereotypes in which he or she is so eagerly trying to escape.  A Paradox, indeed.

Too many sweets in the Cargo Hold in Panama

Ever since I sent my new baseball scout, John Galt to Panama to find the next Mariano Rivera he has been a tad bit distracted by the sweet nectar's of Panamanian women. As John Galt gets more acquainted with the sugar trade, I think his work will improve. John surprised me this morning with a Skype conference. The noticeable pile of bugger sugar and Panamanian women in the background made me assume he was not doing the right scouting.
Nonetheless, he surprised me with an early investigative report of a North Korean flagged Chong Chon Gang carrying sophisticated missile equipment from Cuba headed to North Korea. The missiles were hidden in the sugar cargo holds while trying to transit the Panama Canal. Alarming to think this was coincidentally happening the same night America was introduced to Yoenis Cesepedes, a Cuban born baseball player. Cesepedes was launching missiles of his own in the home run derby at Citi Field in New York last night.

Its amazing how the news covers ever angle of the George Zimmerman trail, but missiles being shipped to North Korea is bottom ticker news. Hmm ho hum.. just North Korea getting some Nucs from Cuba. I want to thank John Galt for his breaking news. Little more baseball and less modern day Graham Greene novel.